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Thursday, April 12, 2007

Have I Mentioned Disfunctional Lately?

Do your relatives scare you? Do you leave your family gatherings mumbling "Something ain't right about those people!"? Do you swear that you were adopted and that your real family was abducted by aliens?

Then this should make you feel better!

Mole (a.k.a. Randomness, My Crazy Cousin) and I were cursed to have been born into the strangest, hillbilly, redneck family on Earth!! Seriously! My family gathers once a year in our hometown to celebrate and spread the wonders of Redneckism!

Now you too can experience the laughter (and tears) that come with being related to people who are a few fries short of a Happy Meal!

Enjoy (and be very thankful).



Note: Do not let the dates on the posts fool you. Due to the extreme nature of this post and the extensive work that was put into it, posts had to be back dated to prevent "spoiling" their debut performance. I believe all six posts were well worth their delayed exposure and hope that everyone gets a great amount of enjoyment out of my family's escapades.


Anonymous said...

I must say, I felt no ill effects from my IV so your uncles and aunts are well trained.

I do not however, remember BBQing Barbies. I do recall trying to hijack a jelly bean truck.

This is why your Dad is NOT allowed at these campouts. That Leslie is a slut. I would have had to put some hurt on her.

I see we have edited the mooner. That's for the best. He paid enough after standing, bent over, pants down while Auntie and I changed the batteries in the camera.

I think the bugs made him suffer enough. I also think I saw that missing Barbie, climb up his ass.

I am so proud of the progress Pinky is making. She will make a fine Redneck grown up.

Chris. Still love us????

Chris said...

You know I still love ya. How could I not? You and your family are nuts! But I love it. heh

Anonymous said...

Oh, poor Chris thinks we are nuts. She hasn't seen anything yet. We are just getting warmed up. Now that she's a member of the family, she will see just how damn crazy we really are.

Wait till she has to take her turn at hooking up the I.V.s , then we'll see just how funny she thinks we are.

Ellie's Mommie said...

Old Woman: You're in so much denial it's sad.

Chris: The Old Woman is NUTS! Don't drink out of her "Best Friend" coffee cup & don't eat the BBQed Cantaloupe!!

Chris said...

heh...got it, no drinking outta best friend mug, and pass on the bbq cantaloupe.

Iv's all around!